Let’s call it…..spilling of the beans
Physical weakness is almost always connected with some kind of mental instability or turmoil.
Whenever you get a sore back out of the blue, weakened knees, weakened calves, stiff neck…they are all connected to previous emotional turbulence. Sometimes, the body only speaks when it reached a certain saturation. Sometimes, it doesn’t need saturation, it can react with an instant and almost violent behavior.
When it happens and the body shouts at you, you ought to listen. Any whirlwind existing inside your mind will be equally matched by a whirlwind inside your skull.
Sometimes, we experience this turmoil as thorns under the skin, much like someone scratching the insides of our skin with a handful of thorns and needles. Most of the time, we’d like to scream of help but we don’t know how exactly; the skills to ask or to self-generate help are simply not there.
It’s in such times, that we must be like Cinderella confronted with the Evil Stepmother: when she sees the sea of beans spilled in front of her, having the monumental task of separating the goods from the bad ones. Such a separation will not be done by screaming for instant help or instant relief from pain.
When the beans spill in front of us, what the Other does and who we are will be mixed in, thrown together in a seamless pattern. We will not recognize which is which.
The soothing will come gradually, slowly, by a process of natural persistence and patience. With no immediate reaction and no added investment in panic or fear. Much like Cinderella, we must take bean by bean, slowly, breathing in between, moving slowly but surely, with no looking back in frustration.
We must do the deed and by doing so, the little helpers, such as (figurative) birds will aid us in our quest.
Such a separation of beans is ultimately our mission, whether it’s based on rejection, abuse, ignorance, emotional unavailability. We must separate the other’s infliction from our Identity. What the Other does will always be beyond our control, we do not operate Another’s belief system or behavior.
We must separate our beans. That is our mission. By following this path, we will feel our bodies healing.